Disaster Garden would be a great title for a book. I can so relate to the garden, and the comforting 'chaos' it brings to the stressors outside of the garden. I don't have fancy baskets for the harvest like you. I seem to forget to bring containers and carry the bounty in my dirty-stained, pulled-out shirt (because I only went to the garden for one thing at first).
And I can so relate to the cold/hot disagreement with your son! I have that exact dynamic with my wife. She seems unwilling to play along with my game of "let's try to make it to Halloween without turning on the heat." We are in temperate Oakland, California, so we really don't get cooler than 55 outside until November, so it seems a reasonable goal to me! I try to argue that if we keep it off until it's really cold, it'll feel all the better when we do turn it on. She just laughs at me and flicks the switch to the thermostat.
I laughed out loud at the theme word. And I adore your garden reflections, even as a non gardener myself. Perhaps having a place to practice the kind of pivoting and peace you describe is enough, even if it never carries over to another area of life....?
I have come to expect you to make me laugh, but this essay is particularly funny. Perhaps because it is both surprising and relatable, like good humor is. I love the vulnerability, another hallmark of yours.
Your garden is beautiful. I am envious. I have cement. Your son’s remark about the Christmas tree made me laugh. And I’m stealing your word if the year for next year. Seriously, I hope things get better for you all. Enjoy the weather.
Thank you! This was our winter 2019/2020 project that turned into a covid project in March. It's in our front yard and I enjoy chatting with neighbors when they walk by.
So beautifully put. And lol an artificial mother. My friend told me today that when she told her young daughter recently “you could work on your attitude” her daughter replied “and you could work on your yelling.” Lol what kids say. Thank you for sharing!
LOL I love what kids say. Once when Thomas was around 10, I asked him to do something. Without missing a beat he handed me a pretend business card and said, "I'm not available right now. Call me later."
This is such a great post. I have a chaos garden that serves me similarly. thank you for these words that help me to name it.
(I used to read you in This Pile..... I have zero idea how I found you back then, nor how you came across my internet reading trail again now, but no matter - I'm glad to find you here. and am absolutely rooting for you guys as you navigate the rough road.)
"I’ve been looking for a way to transfer my gardening mindset over to my Eeyore brain so I can stop carrying around so much fear and just laugh at the abundance that life’s chaos brings to my table."
Thank you for sharing such a heartfelt and helpful story. All the post is deeply wonderful, but that quote in particular hits so close to home that I'll be thinking about it for quite a while.
Now, though -- "where I say I want to get an artificial Christmas tree and he says fine then I’m going to get an artificial mother."
I am uncertain how much freshly-picked produce constitutes measurable clutter, but I do know that no amount of green beans -- however photogenic they may be -- equal a live Christmas fir, so I think the boy has a valid point here.
On the other hand, having reached the age of majority, he should be walking the walk on his values and significantly contributing to the decorating. (And he may well be doing that; might be a good December post for validation purposes, LOL)
Disaster Garden would be a great title for a book. I can so relate to the garden, and the comforting 'chaos' it brings to the stressors outside of the garden. I don't have fancy baskets for the harvest like you. I seem to forget to bring containers and carry the bounty in my dirty-stained, pulled-out shirt (because I only went to the garden for one thing at first).
And I can so relate to the cold/hot disagreement with your son! I have that exact dynamic with my wife. She seems unwilling to play along with my game of "let's try to make it to Halloween without turning on the heat." We are in temperate Oakland, California, so we really don't get cooler than 55 outside until November, so it seems a reasonable goal to me! I try to argue that if we keep it off until it's really cold, it'll feel all the better when we do turn it on. She just laughs at me and flicks the switch to the thermostat.
I LOVE my baskets! I found one in the garage after we moved into this house, and now I take all my silly influencer-style garden photos with baskets.
November is my heat goal too! Like, can we at least get through October, people?! LOL
I love these thoughts. I too am happy with my hands in the soil. Wishing you many days in your garden this fall! 💜
"My New Year's theme word this year is Fuck it," wins best line of the day award.
I’m stealing it for 2024.
haha I can hear my mother in her grave groaning, "oh jennifer..."
I laughed out loud at the theme word. And I adore your garden reflections, even as a non gardener myself. Perhaps having a place to practice the kind of pivoting and peace you describe is enough, even if it never carries over to another area of life....?
Yes, my therapist suggests I could be kinder to myself. :)
Happy to make you laugh.
I have come to expect you to make me laugh, but this essay is particularly funny. Perhaps because it is both surprising and relatable, like good humor is. I love the vulnerability, another hallmark of yours.
Yay, I love making people laugh!
Your garden is beautiful. I am envious. I have cement. Your son’s remark about the Christmas tree made me laugh. And I’m stealing your word if the year for next year. Seriously, I hope things get better for you all. Enjoy the weather.
Thank you! This was our winter 2019/2020 project that turned into a covid project in March. It's in our front yard and I enjoy chatting with neighbors when they walk by.
So beautifully put. And lol an artificial mother. My friend told me today that when she told her young daughter recently “you could work on your attitude” her daughter replied “and you could work on your yelling.” Lol what kids say. Thank you for sharing!
LOL I love what kids say. Once when Thomas was around 10, I asked him to do something. Without missing a beat he handed me a pretend business card and said, "I'm not available right now. Call me later."
Lolol!! Such a good one. I love hearing the banter from your whip-smart family. <3
This is such a great post. I have a chaos garden that serves me similarly. thank you for these words that help me to name it.
(I used to read you in This Pile..... I have zero idea how I found you back then, nor how you came across my internet reading trail again now, but no matter - I'm glad to find you here. and am absolutely rooting for you guys as you navigate the rough road.)
"I’ve been looking for a way to transfer my gardening mindset over to my Eeyore brain so I can stop carrying around so much fear and just laugh at the abundance that life’s chaos brings to my table."
Thank you for sharing such a heartfelt and helpful story. All the post is deeply wonderful, but that quote in particular hits so close to home that I'll be thinking about it for quite a while.
Now, though -- "where I say I want to get an artificial Christmas tree and he says fine then I’m going to get an artificial mother."
I am uncertain how much freshly-picked produce constitutes measurable clutter, but I do know that no amount of green beans -- however photogenic they may be -- equal a live Christmas fir, so I think the boy has a valid point here.
On the other hand, having reached the age of majority, he should be walking the walk on his values and significantly contributing to the decorating. (And he may well be doing that; might be a good December post for validation purposes, LOL)